Who am I?
This came from a forum I used to post on. I really liked it. Happy New Year.
Who am I?Born as an infant I observed the world, without any sense of anything. I was the void. I was just an observer.But then the environment started affecting my mind, molding it, shaping it, and I turned to an extreme extravert. Highly energetic fearless and social. I danced on the stage when other kids didnt were shy and silent.But everything got reversed as I grew up like a magic.I became the introvert, anti-social, and others became extraverts. They teased they disturbed, I was not anti-social, I wanted to be social but I failed.God? Who is God? Who am I? Questions started appearing in my mind.Fear of death kept me in fear every second. Highly paranoid, I thought of every possible ways poop can happen.I changed from religion to religion.In dog I found peace. I felt I was not human. I am an alien. ET.I seeked enlightenment. Truth was the only thing I needed.I bought material things one after another, but none could fill the void within, instead made it expand.That is how I learned how peace can only be found within.I seeked , seeked seeked.I found the characteristics of indigo. So exciting moment for me. I was overwhelmed. I felt special. I learned more and more. But I didnt like the label.It made me feel special and unique. But I dont like feeling special. Being so egotistical.I seeked on and on, I wanted enlightenment. Soon I found, how deluded was everything related to indigo phenomenon.Who am I? Who am I?I was introduced with MBTI. Labels after labels, I got.INTP, add. Spd disorders and personalities. Labels of so many things.Masks after masks I wore, site after site I visited, got banned one after another.Walked on and on in search for enlightenment.
My mouse got broken and I retreated and thought for 2 days continously. And I gained madlightenment instead.I saw the truth. Nothing matters. That is the absolute truth. That is absolute freedom. I dont believe nothing matters. I know.
Then again I used one mask after another and interacted in different forums. But then I stopped.
Who am I?
I used so many masks, that now I dont remember my true self.
I looked within. I am just an empty shell. The void itself. All there remains are the masks.Behind the mask, there is just other masks. And behind the innermost mask there is nothing.
Who am I?
I am the void.
But what is I?
Awareness. The simplest answer possible. Belief, thinking patter, faith, occupation are all changing factors. Even when the I remains they change, the only thing that remains as long as I remain is awareness. That is the only true answer.
But no no no. Degree of awareness changes. And what is awareness without the objects to be aware of? The objects to be aware of are eternally changing, so is the form of awareness.
I am no one. I am nothing, I am impermanent. They is no permanent self. In each second I die. And I die permanently. And a new I gives birth. None can understand it better than me. I was born an extravert, turned into a overly sensitive and emotional introvert and then at-last to a sociopath. I have seen so many changes that only I can know that there is nothing permanence in this world except the impermanence itself. There is no soul. No self. Only void.I am imaginary.
But then I went beyond the I and looked with my eyes.
I saw the flow. The force. I saw the universe. From a tiny point it started from a big bang (or may be not. doesnt matter how it started) that tiny point expanded to give birth to me, this body, this place, this everything. I was born from a sperm, and now I have all these sperms within, and then I will die, and I will decompose ( I will be burned into nothing. that is how it is done in here). And I will merge with universe again. I will become the universe. Wait how am I separate now? I am the universe. The ever flowing change. I am the part of it. In one way or another I will live on and on. Effect is a form of cause.
This body, these all of these things are nothing, just one form of the All, just a temporary separate form, which will some day take a complete different form.I am beyond this body. I am beyond all of these yet I am all of these.
There is the flow. The flow of life. I am the flow.I am that which cannot be named. I am that which cannot be seen. I am that which dont have any form. I am the force. I am the Void.
I am the incomprehensible one. So I never can know who I am. Can you eat your own head? Can your finger touch it's fingertip?
I am that. I am the undeducible, never knowable.
I AM GOD.