Proper breakup etiquette


Here is my question: Recently I decided that the man I was dating was no longer right for me, so I broke it off. Nicely. The problem is that he seems to believe I will be coming back to him. He isn't being a pest and I think he is a great guy, just not for me. Would it have been better for him if I had been more abrupt and made a clean break instead of, what feels to me, like letting him drag his heart around feeling hopeful?

When I was 8 or 9 my family took a vacation in Palm Springs. I was socializing with some friends in a swimming pool when we noticed a bee squirming around. My friend killed it and explained how in Judaism, you're not supposed to let animals suffer.

The reason I'm telling you this is because I hate bees sometimes you need to inflict a little pain in order to act compassionately. If the person you're breaking up with doesn't seem capable of letting go after a direct but soft rejection, then yes, I think the right thing to do is to cut off contact, tell him it's nothing personal, just a policy you have, and wish him the best.

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